the edge
I wish for my mommy
the decision
This is GTA five and i'm gonna rob you!
No I'm not.
Just the customary 1AM check in
the realization
... that our residents may fare happier in los santos.
oh my god.
until the next
Adjusting
Who do you think you are, wearing that gingerbread house?
By this point, it has been a good little while. Making this place feel like home has been the expected challenge of any new living situation. People come and go. Passerbys are neighborly, but are generally only concerned with gossip or events that directly affect their well being. The personalities abound, meshing and clashing on the streets, some going as far as to insist their superiority to others outright. They pull no punches here in ElDorito - but isn't that what I was searching for in the first place?
Aren't we all just searching for the true, the honest, the genuine?
ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT ME
I CAN'T TAKE THE REJECTION
Must find friends... must find acceptance...
Aaaahhhh. That's it.
Fucking photobombed.
just lousy with loyalty
they all love me here...
Not about to confront my loneliness, I picked and ate some mushrooms from the tree stump patch and bee lined it for the docks.
If anything would heighten my spirits, it would be less than questionable attention from an older man.
Oh comforting consistency.
Remember that bad times,
are just times that are bad.
until the next
The next adventure
Blorp, the dreary winter
Contemplating my existence in this town over the endless shimmering winter landscape, I decided to visit my new friends to get a new, fresh outlook on things.
Since Beardo moved in right goddamn next to me, I barged into his house without a second thought to common courtesy.
Well remind me not to fuck you, like Gwen, Vesta, and Merengue.
I thought Merengue was classier than that.
We all make mistakes.
trying to get into my pants via genuine appreciation of interior design...
Dick.
With ElDorito as disappointing as humanity, I catch a ride to my premium escape island vistaroo.
The taxi boating bus grapist already passive aggressively loathing my existence, masking his lifelong escalating rage due to constant rejection from the beautiful people, resulting in serial rapery on his off-time when he isn't busy supporting his wife and daughter.
(Which he does, #1 priority! What a guy.)
I'll be sure to visit with them and sell choking hazards to your children whilst they cater to my stay.
Progressive romance on the moonlit bridge.
This reminds me that I should change my outfit.
This lead me to further introspection. Perhaps my general creephole demeanor was affecting my new neighbor's attitudes towards the white-skinned human that had stepped off the bus and declared herself ruler of the town.
Perhaps they weren't seeing the real Blorp because I wasn't showing them the real Blorp.
It was time to change my ways, and truly begin anew.
... by eavesdropping
Cheating on Patty... Merengue.
Cheaters get what they deserve.
... dressing up like a bear
Wheeeeee!
... and shouting in their faces
Please take me with you.
Please let me go.
What am I going to do?
until the next
A Beginner Blorp
Alrighty!
Blorp's ElDorito
What the hell am I doing?
From the moment we first met, I knew Rocco was a republican.
Yay... neighbors.
What else is there to do in this ridiculous...
DIVING?!
BOOOOOOM! Oh, I'm gonna like this fucking game.
Bring on those dad jokes.
...
...
they did.
Happened to begin playing on this strange native holiday where I have to dress like a duck until the clock strikes zero.
Feels kind of insult-provoking to the penguin there, but whatever Japan
Sorry, snowman
He'll never have the opportunities.
... or the rest of his family.
... later,
This fucking creep.
(also, see rapey, kidnappy fart-monster)
Incriminating himself since day one.
Seriously, every time.
Will never be able to leave the house without some weird boat creep singing about his wife and family... and then insinuating... well, something.
WHYYYYYYY?!
Why do we have to talk about the deep dark trigger inducing person-shaping realness that haunts my entire existence?
I just wanted some coconuts.
Fuck you, Kapp'n.
I'm going home.
Gonna go fishing with these republicans.
until the next
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